Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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