so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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