she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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