Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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