He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
