...so i touched it.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
COCAINE IS GR8
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
