Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
