I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
We're too hungover to prance.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
