You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
