Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
