i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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