She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
