His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Randomize
