windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
