No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
