His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
