Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
The power of my boobs compel you
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
