Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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