he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I think people are normalizing furries
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
