Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
