We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
