Someone shit on the floor
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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