Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
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