I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
