I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
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