I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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