Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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