i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Randomize
