if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
