gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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