watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
