Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
