So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
