Just mADE A PArabola og urine
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
