Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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