I hate your face
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
