physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
My breasts were aching with rage.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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