and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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