I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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