Im at strip club and am horny
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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