But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
