Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
