I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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