she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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