Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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