I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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