Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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