True but thats because hes a fetus.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
