We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
