he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
