im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
